So, I don't really know where to start this blog at. Do I start with saying that I'm feeling so overwhelmed right now? Or do I start by saying that I wouldn't ever think that my best friend would want to commit suicide...Yeah. That's right. My best friend for almost two years contemplated suicide about a week and a half ago. When I heard this, my heart raced and I wanted to break down and cry. What would I do without this girl?? She's been apart of my life for so long and yeah, we've had our ups and downs but, I would do anything for her. And now she wants to end her life??? So, my morning has been fairly overwhelming. I called her this morning after realizing that she called me earlier. It sounded like she was very upset. And she started by saying "Katelyn, I tried killing myself a week ago." Like I said, my heart dropped. So she told me she wanted me to go with her to the doctor in an hour. So I went. Just like any good friend would do. I went, knowing it would be uncomfortable and hard to bear. When they picked me up (her and her mom) I got in and she seemed fine. We finally got into the doctors office and she was not wanting to talk so her mom did all the talking. She said that she had contemplated about a week and a half ago and the doctor asked her what her plan was. She didnt want to answer but she said that she wouldnt feel any more comfortable if me and her mom left so she just went ahead and said "I was going to stab myself." My breath caught and I couldn't think. Her mom followed her up by saying, the only thing keeping her from doing it was her little brother, who is 15. I'm really close to her little brother and this made me breakdown. I couldn't handle it. I was crying and so was her and her mom. The entire time I was with her, I didn't say too much. I didn't know what to say or what to do to comfort her. I wanted her to know that I was there for her and that I wouldn't ever judge her or think less of her and that I loved her. But for some reason, I couldn't convey those feelings. I didn't know how. I just wanted to hug her and tell her that it'd be alright but how could I if I'd never been through it before? I just feel like a horrible let down and a terrible friend. I have no idea what to say or what to do to make her feel better. I just need ya'lls prayers: for me and for her and her family. I know we could all use all the help we could get. I just love her too much to let anything happen to her.

Listening to: Coldplay